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Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Good-bye Miami

Parrish had to leave at 8:00 because he needed to get back to Family Rest so he could get his morning drugs.  He was quiet this morning, deep in thought, it appeared.  When he left me, we hugged each other hard, and I shed a little tear.  His eyes remained dry - a rarity in our many “Good-byes” over the years.  I have to wonder if the medication that keeps him so calm is pushing his emotions down deep into his brain.  As hard as it is to see him almost emotionless (for him), it is preferable to seeing him manic and hallucinating.  
One of the most startling changes in his personality is that he wasn’t constantly perseverating about his appearance, repeatedly asking, “Mama, don’t you think I look good in this shirt?  I don’t look age at all, do I?”  There are, however, some things (harmless) things that have not changed.  He is still obsessed with looking well groomed; he just doesn’t talk about it all the time, still takes him clothes out to be laundered, taking a chunk out of his allowance every week.  I will concede him that habit, especially since some of his articles of clothing have not returned from the laundry at Family Rest.  
It’s now 11:00, and I am at the gate waiting for my flight. No upgrades were available, but I was assigned a good seat close to the front.  
I should feel rested.  I slept enough to feel rested, but I am already tired, and I haven’t even boarded the plane.  This thing with my upper back interferes with my sleep.  I am sure it is keeping me tired, but I don’t know who to see about it.
Boarding now..............
©cj Schlottman

Please read "South Beach."  It it's all about our my time with Parrish.


Sue said...

I always go to physical therapy when I have nagging back stuff. It seems to get me back on track.

Your visit sounds mixed, but at least no real drama. And maybe, as he stabilizes, they'll be able to walk down whatever it is that's stabilizing his mood to where he's a little less flat without being over the top. It's such a fine-tuned juggling act with those meds, isn't it?



Linda @ A La Carte said...

Hmmmmmmm didn't realize you were having some back pain. Yes that would interfere with your sleep. Glad you had a good visit. h

Martha Mawson said...

I'm glad you left Miami feeling calmer about the situation with your son. I would imagine leaving if he were not doing well would be heart-breaking. So sorry your back is bothering you - nothing worse. A glass of red wine, some relaxing music and a hot bath, perhaps? Sending hugs from over here.

Amanda said...

I'm glad the visit went well. It sounds like the medication is really working for him.

Katie Gates said...

Hi cj, I just read South Beach and this post. It sounds like you had a restful time with Parrish. That is good to hear!

Life@Cee said...

Mental illness is so hard on everyone in the sufferer's life. Thank goodness for medications that take the edge off even though they don't cure...yet.